Earth Finally Destroys Japan

The Earth has self-combusted Japan with a series of earthquakes, tsunamis, and volcanic eruptions finally putting an end to the anticipation.

“After a few hours of complete devastation the seas opened up and swallowed the entire nation whole,” said one geological expert.

“Quite frankly this has come as no surprise.”

Survivors living in Guam are still yet to grasp the magnitude of the event with the level of alarm from early reports reading at about the same level of panic as last week’s hailstorm in regional Nagoya.

Details have emerged of the Senkaku Islands having remained in tact during the geological chaos with early reports suggesting China has already built at least seven military ports in the area.