Indecisiveness was blamed for a disastrous gaijin nod exchange in Akihabara this morning.
Friendly-Gaijin was keen to exchange niceties and looked for eye contact early. However, Not-So-Friendly-Gaijin pretended not to notice until looking up at the last second causing a knee-jerk reaction from Friendly-Gaijin who nodded in vain.
“I’d given the nod just as we crossed paths – I didn’t even know if he had acknowledged my foreign exchange or if he had given me the gaijin ghosting,” Friendly-Gaijin said.
Friendly-Gaijin is now suffering from “trauma” and is anxious about future fellow gaijin encounters.
“I’m now really self-conscious about when to look up, how long to look up, and whether to acknowledge the existence of Close-Vicinity-Gaijin.”
Experts have advised all gaijin to remain calm and confident when bumping into other foreigners.
“The key is maintaining a confident posture by keeping your shoulders back and making short sharp bursts of attempted eye-contact to avoid any last second desperate acknowledgements,” says a gaijin who has lived in Japan two years and thinks he is an expert on all things Japan.