Workers nationwide have celebrated the passing of a new bill scrapping a 3-year time limit on the employment of temporary staff giving them the flexibility to choose from a range of limited jobs once sacked.

The government has outlined the need for big business to maintain stability, which can only be achieved by the constant rotation of workers that can be disposed of at any given moment.

“This added flexibility for workers will give big business the stability it needs to consistently churn out a profit for wealthy investors whilst supplying average people with their next unstable job,” a government official said.

The new legislation has been welcomed by big business, which gently urged the government to ease the rigidity burden of full-time work on employees to grant them more flexibility.

“I always feel constrained in long-term employment with sick leave, pension benefits, and paid holidays – I love having the freedom of being allowed to constantly search for new work because you never know when you’re employment will be terminated,” a part-time worker said.

The laws, however, will have a negligible effect on various professions, such as English teaching, with almost every part-time English instructor already having little chance of shifting to full-time employment due to being easily replaceable.


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