English teachers employed with GABA Eikawa Corporation were informed on Saturday they would be receiving paid holidays for the next two weeks, sparking wild scenes of jubilation.

“Let’s party! And socialize with strangers!” squealed one English teacher after hearing the news.

A large number of GABA English teachers in Tokyo decided the best plan of attack was to assemble around 50 foreigners and commence mingling in the biggest city in Japan.

“Shi-BUYA!” an English teacher recently arriving from China texted to his colleagues.

According to local reports, a combined average of around 25% of their incoming holiday pay was dispersed around bars and clubs.

GABA officials announced today that Japan’s English proficiency is expected to decline over the next two weeks.

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