Another sex god flew into Narita Airport yesterday still oblivious to his incredible sexual prowess.

Official figures indicate that most sex gods come to Japan for the same purpose.

“I wanted to visit Japan for the technology and anime,” said Sex God number 79,185 for the current month.

Kevin, as he is known back home, is expected to become aware of his powers over the coming days as people stare and girls giggle.

The farther a sex god travels from central Tokyo the more intense his attractiveness becomes, experts warn.

Sex God 79,185 is likely to fully grasp the extent of his potential at kinkakuji, the Temple of the Golden Pavilion in Kyoto, where Kevin will be asked by a bunch of schoolgirls if they can take a photo with him.

Image: Flickr/Retinafunk


  1. U guys are hilarious! It’s like “theonion” for expats. Write longer articles! Sooooo many of my nonjapan friends thought the damned gaijin cafe was real lol! One American friend was all excited n wondering how she could get a job in such a place lol!

  2. Holy crap! That things with the schoolgirls wanting photos at the Golden Temple happened to me and my mates too! It was one of the oddest things

  3. Look at his child-like, modest face. Sadly, he will grow an ego the size of Jupiter after a month of being surrounded by Japanese girls who fall to their knees at the sight of his mighty, tall white nose!

  4. I’m still waiting for this to happen to me! Maybe if i was younger, better looking, interesting and less desperate looking.

    • Hey, come now @jay McFarlane, no need to be like that, don’t sell yourself short, you forgot stupid…. 😉


  5. LOL this is 10000% accurate. I’ll be referring this link to all my foreign friends who actually enjoy Japan… the people like the guy in the photo are the only people who don’t consider Japan to be a total Hell hole.

    • Japan is a total hell hole. There are gaijin who know and gaijin who don’t because well… they’re like Kevin-sama. He must be loving all the attention he doesn’t get back home and staying utterly oblivious to everything that’s actually going on around him.


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