Japan Celebrates Mountain Day: Low-skilled Foreign Workers, Okinawans Sacrificed

Japan has celebrated its first Mountain Day (Yama no Hi) national holiday by offering low-skilled foreign workers and Okinawans to an active volcano in...

“I-t-s S-o G-o-d-d-a-m H-o-t”: Important Hidden Message Found in Emperor’s Speech

A piece of extremely practical information has been discovered encrypted within the transcript of Emperor Akihito’s unprecedented speech enlightening the people that “it’s goddam...

Typhoon Hits Japan at Hottest Part of Day, Quickly Loses Will to Live

Typhoon “No. 5” landed on the east coast of Japan during yesterday’s peak temperature of around 32 degrees Celsius and quickly lost the will...

Japanese Emperor Hints at Wish to Abdicate, Begins Long Ascent to Heaven

Japanese Emperor Akihito indicated his wishes to abdicate today due to old age and weakening health in a rare televised speech just before starting...

Foreign Menace Using “Mai” (枚) to Count Long Thin Objects

A foreigner has been reportedly causing havoc for the local community in Yokohama City by using the “mai” counter expression for long thin objects. Terry...

Study Finds Positive Correlation Between Speed of Japanese Spoken and Being Awesome

A new study has found a positive correlation between the speed of which foreigners speak Japanese and their overall Japanese awesomeness. Researchers have concluded that...

Giant Disaster Alert Issued After First Female Governor Elected in Japan

A giant disaster warning was issued yesterday in Japan hours after the country’s first female governor was elected into power. Citizens living in the Kanto...

Harry Potter Sightings in Japan to Rise with Release of “Harry Potter and The...

Gaijin wearing spectacles have been put on high alert after the latest release of the final instalment of the Harry Potter book series. “You look...

Urgent NHK Report: Emperor Considering Rearranging Bedroom Furniture

NHK has revealed breaking news that the emperor is thinking about changing the layout of his bedroom furniture in the coming weeks. “Any alterations in...

Konbini Queue Moves Slower Than the Other One, Gaijin Blames Discrimination

A foreigner has blamed racial discrimination for a convenience store queue moving more slowly than the other one. Sam Carey stepped into a queue that...

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