National income tax files are due in full by March 15 leaving less than one week for foreign nationals to ask their wives to complete the forms.

Foreigners, however, need to ask someone else to file a tax return for them if at least one of the following is true:

  • they don’t have a wife
  • they are not talking to their wife
  • their wife is tired of them not being proficient in Japanese
  • they don’t have a fax machine

“I don’t have a wife yet, I need to get help from my token Japanese friend before March 15,” says one foreigner.

Many gaijin who are not married but have more than one girlfriend are scrambling to decide which one to ask for help.

“Naomi is nice, but I feel it would be pushing for way too much commitment if I ask her to help me with the taxes, I know, I’ll just ask Yumiko,” said 13-years-a-gaijin Norman Stokes.

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