The Japanese government launched the “Warm Biz” campaign on Wednesday informing people they should put on more shit on colder days.
“We would like to let everyone know that in Japan, where we have a season that is cold, it would be wise to wear more fabric,” said government spokesman Ryoya Fujihito.
Many people were grateful for the government warning saying they may have forgotten what to do once their location on Earth was receiving less heat from the sun’s rays.
“Oh yeah, I forgot clothes help maintain my body temperature when it gets cold,” said 48-year-old Natsuki Aratani.
According to government sources, the ‘Getting people to buy more shit’ agenda is one of the Abe administration’s more sophisticated economic policies.